How I Handled the First Day of Kindergarten

Luke made some very profound statements on the morning of his third birthday. He was sitting in bed and said three things to me that have stuck with me for years. One of these was "When I am five I will go to Kindergarten and I will ride the bus without you." Well that day is here. Even though I had five and a half years to prepare for it, I still don't think I was ready.

We have been prepping for Kindergarten for a while now. Pre-K last year talked about it everyday--about going to school five days a week, homework, independence, etc. We talked about it all summer. We went clothes shopping and organized school supplies. We went shopping for things to put in his lunch box.  I started having flashbacks of Luke's first week of life. . .

Five and a half years ago my sweet Luke was born. They told me he had a broken clavicle. I didn't cry. They told me he was breathing funny. I called them idiots and I didn't cry. He didn't latch on to eat for days. I was frustrated but I didn't cry.  I gave him a bottle and he was eating so fast he forgot to breathe and turned blue. I scolded him, told him he would get himself in trouble acting like that. I didn't cry. When the pediatrician called me at home to tell me his bilirubin was too high and he needed to be admitted to the intensive care unit immediately, I started crying. The flood gates had finally opened. I had been sitting in the nursery rocker, trying to coax Luke to eat when the phone rang. After the pediatrician said "26" the tears started coming and there were no more words. Gene came in and took the phone out of my hands, reassured the doctor we were on our way, and started gathering our things. I just cried. We put Luke in the car seat and I sat in the back next to him and cried. It was raining like a monsoon and the roads were flooded.  I remember not being able to even see where we were going. Gene was trying to be calm and strong and I was falling apart. I cried at the hospital when they took our information and walked us up to the NICU. I handed him over to the nurse and stepped back out of her way. When they shot his chest x-ray the nurse held his arms up over his head and a sob caught in my throat hearing the way he screamed when they manipulated that broken collar bone. Another nurse, trying to be kind, put her hand on my shoulder and said, "its okay honey. It's just an x-ray. It doesn't hurt him." I wanted to slap her because she didn't know MY baby and it DID hurt him. I cried off and on for days. We would go home from the hospital and I would start planning when to go back. It was still raining. Our street was flooded. We tried to go to him and had to turn around because the water in the road was too high. So I would cry.

That is how I felt the weekend before the first day of Kindergarten. Crying off an on over anything. We had some stressful events happen at meet the teacher night and I thought to myself "this is why people homeschool."

Over the weekend, our dog nipped at Luke. He is partially blind and completely high strung and he got spooked. It was the third time he has nipped to draw blood, but we weren't hanging around for a fourth. On Monday, he moved in with my parents. We've had him since he was a puppy and since before we were married. He is a good dog, a faithful dog. I miss him.

I took Luke to school Monday morning and walked him to his class. When the teacher dismissed the parents I gave him a hug and a kiss and left before he saw my tears. I didn't go to the kiss and cry breakfast because that would only make things worse. I went home. Will was at Grammy's house. The house was so quiet. No children, no dog, and I didn't have anything scheduled to do. I ended up aimlessly driving around town. I went to stores where I didn't need anything and didn't buy anything. I would go to two or three stores and then come home. The quiet would get to me again so I would find another few stores to go to. I think I came home and left at least three times that day.

I will address Luke's experience of Kindergarten in the next post, this one is about me.

I guess I am having Kindergarten grief. I am done with the constant crying and have moved on to anger and jealousy.  This week without him has seemed so terribly long. Even with Will around, we both look at each other and think about Luke. I am starting to think, "Why do they get him for so many hours? They get him FORTY hours a week! EIGHT hours a day! I only see him awake for FOUR hours a day. This is unfair. He's MY baby. This is why people homeschool." I miss him so much. I didn't expect this feeling. If it weren't for Will, I might just stand at the bus stop all day waiting for him to come home. He won't even let me make his lunch anymore--he has bought cafeteria every day.

On the flip side--Will and I are having fun with one-on-one time. He is so sweet and giggly, it is what gets me through my day.

I know that in another week or so I won't feel this way about Luke going off to school. It was an emotion that took me unexpectedly. I thought I was SOOO ready for school to start. Going from the three day week to the five day week makes for a long week. Bottom line though, Luke is having the time of his life. He loves it. He smiles when he gets on the bus and smiles when he gets off the bus. Oh, the bus. . . that's for the next post.

Flora & Frank

On Mother's Day my mom gave me a pretty hanging plant. Days after hanging it right outside my breakfast room window a mourning dove had made her nest smack in the middle of my plant. I didn't really notice at first until the plant started to die in the middle. I climbed up to see what the trouble was and found this:

Since then the plant has completely died leaving us an unobstructed view of her and her nest. We named her Flora. When daddy bird came to visit we named him Frank. Flora and I have bonded through all of this, she did kill my mother's day plant, after all. Early this week Flora was perched on the edge of the pot looking very panicked. I thought maybe they eggs were hatching so I climbed up to see, but instead there was a fresh THIRD egg!! I guess that one was a surprise to her too!

Yesterday evening, Frank came by to relieve Flora for a bit. They were both perched on the edge so I thought I'd check out the progress of the eggs and make sure there wasn't a fourth. This is what I found:



Do you see the two fuzzy baby bird heads in the nest? Look left-center. And the third egg in between momma and her babies.

I couldn't stop taking pictures while Flora showed off her babies. Frank is a scaredy cat and flew away when I approached with the camera.


Peeking out to say hello!

She is usually pretty shy about feeding her babies when I'm hanging around, but I got this one.

Two babies, one head up, the other head tucked under momma.

It has been so fun to watch this process of nature. I just wanted to share with you.

So, what should we name the babies???

Dear Will,

On December 9, 2010, your naked, slimy body was placed up on my belly.  I just kept drying you off with the blankets and purposefully, lovingly, making you cry. I am a NNICU nurse. You will not be allowed to grunt and get yourself into the NNICU. I will make you scream every extra drop out of your lungs so that you are breathing perfectly. The doctor thinks I am a bit crazy for this sort of behavior.

Where on earth did you get all that luscious dark hair?

You got it from your mama.

You are loved immediately.

In December, you discover that you love baths. It does not take you long to learn how to splash, and subsequently get moved out of your cozy sink tub into the big tub where you could splash without creating a flood inside the house.  

 In January, I prop you up in the nursery rocker, dressed like your brother before, and act like a maniac to try to get some grins out of you. i am successful! Your smile lights up my world!

You are a little spitfire! You do not want to be wrapped up in your blanket. You are already rolling over.

 February comes along, and I am still trying to figure out how to help you sleep. You love your mama and only want to sleep when she is with you. However, my love, I can not do that.

I love you anyway.



In March, your personality blooms. You are such a joy to our lives.  

 Before there was you, Luke never knew he needed a brother. In April, he teaches you how to play trucks. Which is great fun until you learn how to take them away from him!

You are fascinated with your big brother.

 In May, Mama finally gives you cereal. Tasty treat! It doesn't help you sleep. We try everything--even some herbal concoction we buy off the internet. All it did was stain your shirt, blanket, sheets, burp cloth.

 In June you are starting to grow back some of your lost hair. Your baby mohawk is starting to fill in on the sides. Mama has already cut it twice to keep the long strands out of your eyes. There is no direction of comb over to combat this baldie look.

I love it!



In July Mama only takes one picture. Maybe the camera was lost? At least I got both the boys. You have been such a trooper this summer. Mama totes you all over the place getting Luke to classes at the rec center and swimming lessons. You nap on the go and eat on the fly. 

In August you are on the move. You are crawling--and fast! I can't catch you long enough to get your clothes on! But you are so darn cute, I don't care!

In September you are joyful! You go to nursery school once a week. You start to eat real food. There are six big teeth in that little mouth.



Come October, you are a little charmer! You are walking everywhere and making friends with everyone. You have no fear!

In November, you are climbing into things, onto things. but not so much off of things. You take a few dramatic falls a day, but are none worse for the wear. I have started a collection of pictures of you in/on things you are not supposed to be in/on or that you are stuck in/on.

I took to your hair with the big boy clippers after I was playing with it and realized I could put it into pigtails if you were a girl.

In December you are one! Such a big boy. You want to do big boy things and play with the big boy toys. You walk and climb up and climb down and are happy and get mad.

You put yourself to sleep and wake up mostly happy.

You love your blue blankie and your big brother.

You love your mama and your daddy.

You love your puppy and know how to pet nicely.

You don't talk yet, but you know the signs for "more" and "all done" and we are working on "please."

You bring joy to everyone around you.

You are a snuggler. You give great hugs and big sloppy wet open-mouthed kisses and just lay your head on my shoulder to say "hi. I missed you."

You love cheese and corn and yogurt and that's pretty much what you eat.



I love you and am so happy you came into my life!

Outtakes of the year

Thank goodness for digital photography. I would have a lot of worthless pictures hanging around otherwise. Now I can just look at them and laugh. My strategy when taking picture (especially with the kids) is to just take a whole bunch, and maybe one or two will turn out great. So then I end up with the other 47 that weren't so great. And me, well, I end up falling in love with the shot of the kid screaming or picking their nose or something because I think it is funny.

All of us have had a bad picture taken. These are mine to share with you.

 No, I was not just snuggling close to my newborn baby. I was PASSED out from sheer exhaustion. This happened every time I sat still for more than five minutes for about the first month-six weeks of Will's life. No, I never dropped him, just woke up with a horrible crick in my neck. I never knew this picture was taken either, until I was going through the camera one day.  (The camera strap in the photo adds to the charm.)

 I wish I could rotate this. It is much funnier upright. 

 Will caught twice mid-sneeze.

I think this might be one that when Will looks back on in about 15 years he might be asking us, "Why are you letting him hold me like that?" and I don't think I have an answer for it.

Will was frequently caught with the "deer in the headlights" look also known as the "WTF??!!" look.

Funny little faces!

 I think Grammy was the only one prepared for this shot. 

 And a few closed-eyes pics.

 Oh the precidaments these boys get themselves, and each other, into. . .

My little cow! Those weren't spots on the camera--they were spots on his face. Chick-fil-a cow spots to be exact. Little stickers from his kid's meal that day. He fell asleep on them and somehow ended up on his face and when I tried to tell him, he wouldn't believe me and wouldn't let me take them off.

 Just looking so teenager-y and put out by this picture!

 I dunno. . . just something about this one.

Some of that raw emotion I love so much.

 Won't someone tell me what is going on?

Ear infection? Check

Snores? Check

Drool? Check

Yep, he's a Moore boy.

I seriously heart this picture. I love that Luke took a picture of his belly and toes. L-O-V-E it.

Totally relaxed.

 And for the Grande Finale!

There is an expression around this house know as the "Drunk Gene Face." Although its really, the drunk Gene eyes. But, anyway, it is the expression in which whe have caught all the boys at somepoint.

It originated here. . . with Gene.

And his sleepy, droopy, drinkin' eyes.

(He is going to KILL me when he sees that I have put this picture up. But I am going to remind him that he TOLD me to do an entire post on the drunk Gene face and I have to give you a reference point.)

I don't remember if he was really drunk here or if it was just a bad shot, but these are the eyes. . .

And here are the boys, emulating their father.

Luke's had wayyyy more than two Drunk Gene Face pictures in his lifetime, but for this post I just went back through this year.

Hope you enjoyed it!